Facebook is the number one social networking service in the world. As of January 2011, Facebook has more than 600 million active users. An estimated 42% of the U.S. population has a Facebook account. It is the third largest web company, behind Google and Amazon.
Should you get a Facebook page? Should you allow your child to have one? Here are a few suggestions to encourage you toward a Christ-honoring decision about Facebook.
- Adopt any technology your child adopts – One hundred years ago, no one could have imagined our digital world. Today’s technology is progressive, in that one system builds on the shoulders of the last system. While MySpace was the rage just a few years ago, Facebook improved social media and surpassed it. This would be fine if technology had reached its peak, but we don’t know what the next wave will bring! By adopting the technology your child uses now, you will find it easier to understand the world in which he or she lives, and increase your ability to communicate and relate to him or her.
- Communicate safety and trust – The growing up years bring many opportunities to discuss the issue of trust. Online social media is neither a right nor an entitlement. It is a privilege – and one that can be taken away if trust is broken. So, yes, allowing your child to have a Facebook page is partly about building trust, so don’t be afraid to frame it in those terms. But go farther in explaining that there may be no more dangerous world for teens to enter than cyberspace. Online predators flourish in the secrecy of social media, and masquerade as kids in order to build relationships. You demonstrate loads of love when you “swim” with your child in these waters, even if he or she would prefer to go it alone. The rules you determine for Facebook usage are both about trust and safety.
- Require a “friends only” control – Fortunately, Facebook allows for privacy settings whereby you can restrict the amount of information that the public can see. Agree with your child that his or her privacy is a non-negotiable requirement for Facebook usage. To learn more about “Controlling How You Share,” click here.
- Become your child’s online “friend” and then listen without participating – Kids, especially teens, will always look for a place to interact without their parents being around. For my peers, it was the skating rink on Thursday nights! Now Facebook has become that virtual place for parent-free dialogue, even more so than the Food Court at your local mall. I encourage you to join your son or daughter’s list of Facebook Friends. This will allow you to “listen” to status updates and comments from your child’s social network. However, if you see a comment on Facebook that you want to discuss, do so in person with your child – not online. When a parent enters the public dialogue, the teens run away. You can sit down with your child in person and ask, “Is your friend alright? He sounded really angry over what happened at the football game.” This also sends a strong signal to your child that you know what is going on in his or her world, and that you care enough to ask.
Camper Corner
Do you see social media (texting, Twitter, or Facebook) as a right or as a privilege? Do you see your parents' involvement as an intrusion of privacy, or as a way that they express love and concern for you?
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